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relationship steps

posted by Anonymous on 13 December, 2020

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one thing i that myself tend to do is rush into something that i feel could be a choice recently yesterday i just gave my number to this man i really like in regards of having a crush on him for whom i’ve known him for quite some time. i definitely didn’t wanna rush into it because with that can create a set of issues since i gave my number i just feel like i need to still take it slow i wanna be in a relationship in but need to be cautious in making sure it doesn’t go too far

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Anonymous ● 15 December, 2020 ⚓︎

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hi , i feel im going through the same thing too desire to be in a relationship is normal its finding out more about him which takes time , and then reevaluating whether you still like him and see being in a relationship a good thing the other hard bit is establishing your values, standards fro yourself and within the relationship , if a relationship were to happen the second i feel i really need to be strong about and not idealise or rush in a relationship. ive had 2 previous relationships; both were serious to me however because i couldnt /didnt have strong standards, self-love or boundaries .. i wasnt treated right and eventually after 2.5 years found it was all lies, and i was being cheated on badly ; 4.5 years , had to let go of this controlling and draining relationship because i couldnt trust him with my future , he wouldn't even be fair to me or treat me respectfully , or with consideration. he had become a dominating and critical person and i as just drained , codependent and anxious so what is important is recognise they were not the right person. if im going to have a relationship , it needs to be with the right person & that takes me being the right person to myself self-love comes before real love can find you . you will only now how to protect and care/assert for your standards if you practice self-love i think generally men are naturally more go-getters and selfish than women, more sexually fuelled and want dominance so its important a woman knows how to be treated well by males i have to learn this crap because i didnt grow up with males around so arent that comfortable and can easily express myself and my needs its a long road