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both have depression in relationship

posted by Anonymous on 21 May, 2020

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i find when im depressed i become so withdrawn and ignore my partners needs in the relationship and i have nothing to give whereas he becomes very agitated, arrogant and direspectful and demanding when he is moody. initially i gave a lot in the relationship to please him and make his life better which it did help him get through his dark times. then we became long distance for 3 years, visiting each other sometimes. however my own anxiety/depression has been affecting me again and again . over the last half a year it has been particuarly bad and i feel older and that ill never get a hold of my moods and live well. i dont know how i can be with him and look after my own mental health. i feel too tired for relationships yet i feel alone without it . i dont think he is able to care about my mental health and support me to get better. it feels so alone for me and him . i just dont know how we can both make it as a couple

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Anonymous ● 21 May, 2020 ⚓︎

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"i dont know how i can be with him and look after my own mental health." perhaps you can't. it may be time for you to put your needs first, and give your full attention to your own mental health. not every relationship is meant to last forever. the most important relationship you will ever have is with yourself. determine what is best for you, and proceed in that direction. when you give your full strength to yourself, you may find that you are more resilient than you imagined. i wish you the best.