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both have depression in relationship

posted by Anonymous on 21 May, 2020

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i find when im depressed i become so withdrawn and ignore my partners needs in the relationship and i have nothing to give whereas he becomes very agitated, arrogant and direspectful and demanding when he is moody. initially i gave a lot in the relationship to please him and make his life better which it did help him get through his dark times. then we became long distance for 3 years, visiting each other sometimes. however my own anxiety/depression has been affecting me again and again . over the last half a year it has been particuarly bad and i feel older and that ill never get a hold of my moods and live well. i dont know how i can be with him and look after my own mental health. i feel too tired for relationships yet i feel alone without it . i dont think he is able to care about my mental health and support me to get better. it feels so alone for me and him . i just dont know how we can both make it as a couple

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Anonymous ● 21 May, 2020 ⚓︎

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it's important not to become the "therapist" in a relationship. long distance is so hard, you need to supplement your lack of physical presence with communication and sometimes it can really drag on you. make sure you're not staying in this relationship because you feel you have to and if you don't feel supported talk is out with him like like you did here. nothing bad can come from that in the long run. best of luck, take care