👍¹³ 💡³³ ☕¹⁰ Big Boy Ben ● 30 July, 2018 ⚓︎

first and foremost i want to say it's great you're talking about this. sometimes just getting it off your chest is better than nothing at all. what i'm hearing is that you are insecure about how valid your emotions are. you look at people and you see them acting depressed and when you reflect upon yourself you develop a feeling of being an "imposter" with this illness. coupled with the fact that you are lacking emotional closeness from other people which is why you're craving attention and being unfamiliar with recovering, its really a tough mental space you are in right now. i'd like to reassure you that what you are experiencing is okay and normal and that having any emotion is perfectly fine. there is never a need to repress emotion and doing so will only cause anxiety like you are experiencing now. recovering fully will probably be a long hard road and you may find yourself sliding back sometimes, but it is always a good thing to feel better. try and find some people to talk to, it could make a world of difference.