👍2 💡13 Big Boy Ben

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🎂 08 June, 2017

💎 gifts on this person's behalf have paid for 298.98 hours of server time 💎

posts by Big Boy Ben

chat times have been removed
16 September, 2018
1 insight

insights from Big Boy Ben

28 October, 2018
⚓︎ in addition feel free to come back here anytime, we are always ready to talk. it can always get better.

28 October, 2018
⚓︎ hey no matter what you may think this is not normal and you need to seek immediate help for this issue. please check out the support page for resources: mellowtalk.com/resources

i'm new here
16 September, 2018
⚓︎ hello! all you have to do is visit the front page and select "listener" or "talker" depending on your needs. then, if all goes according to plan, someone will join with the opposite role and you can chat.

i wish this forum was more active
18 August, 2018
⚓︎ the idea behind restricting chat was to insure people were on at the same time because we don't have enough people on yet to create a conversation every hour of every day. i thought by having chat hours, people would come on at certain times and to a degree it has been successful. that said it is still not creating as many chats as i would want. do people think chat limitations should be removed?

i wish this forum was more active
18 August, 2018
⚓︎ i'm so happy people are enjoying the site! the community here is awesome and i do my best every day to expand it. it's slow going, but i see more and more people on mellowtalk every day!

does anyone here lose sleep over their anxiety?
03 August, 2018
⚓︎ i used to have real issues with anxiety induced insomnia. what ended up helping me was actually what helped me cope in the first place: developing meaningful, healthy habits. what worked more than anything was working out every day. but really how it started was stretching every morning and every night. that way, no matter what, i would have something to do even for a few minutes a day that i knew would impact me positively. i began meditating 10 minutes before bed as well and that would really do wonders for me as, although you aren't supposed to drift off while meditating, the same techniques used to meditate could be employed while laying in bed for maximum relaxation. once i developed the willpower to keep up these smaller habits, i started a consistent workout routine and that more than anything has kept me going through bouts of depression and flares of anxiety. i don't know what will work for you, but i can guarantee that creating these daily traditions is really beneficial in the long run. i personally use the "habits" app for android, but any streak tracking app could assist you in committing. good luck with the issue, it certainly can't last forever if you put your mind to solving it.

it feels good to be depressed
30 July, 2018
⚓︎ first and foremost i want to say it's great you're talking about this. sometimes just getting it off your chest is better than nothing at all. what i'm hearing is that you are insecure about how valid your emotions are. you look at people and you see them acting depressed and when you reflect upon yourself you develop a feeling of being an "imposter" with this illness. coupled with the fact that you are lacking emotional closeness from other people which is why you're craving attention and being unfamiliar with recovering, its really a tough mental space you are in right now. i'd like to reassure you that what you are experiencing is okay and normal and that having any emotion is perfectly fine. there is never a need to repress emotion and doing so will only cause anxiety like you are experiencing now. recovering fully will probably be a long hard road and you may find yourself sliding back sometimes, but it is always a good thing to feel better. try and find some people to talk to, it could make a world of difference.

i'm confused
11 July, 2018
⚓︎ your emotions are real and totally valid. the fact that you're here talking about these things is already a step in the right direction and you're such a good communicator too! i think part of the issue is how you frame the problem: you have these thoughts that you don't enjoy, you let them go, and then you're upset that you no longer have negative thinking that causes you trouble. if you haven't guessed, it sounds like you may have some emotional problems that need to be sorted out. a big part of depression and anxiety especially are these spinning thoughts that just go round and round without logical basis. if anything, i personally would feel happier that you are able to be rid of the negative thinking rather than being stuck with it. the fact that you are able to consider your thoughts and let them go is healthy and in no way diminishes the validity of the thoughts themselves. you don't have to be fixated on things and keep them close to you in order to live your life. try and find some people to talk to about some of your thinking. it doesn't have to be major stuff, but it is really amazing how much better you feel when you can get things off your chest.

the mandatory lowercase letters is a nice change of pace
28 June, 2018
⚓︎ you're welcome, happy you like it!