⚓︎you can always reach out to your school counselor if you feel comfortable. it really sounds like you are going through the motions but are not fully enjoying life. keeping a journal & write down 3-5 things that you are grateful for daily may help you refocus on the positive. please look at ways that you can get involved with something in your school or community if there is something you are passionate about ( animals, art , etc).
⚓︎please stop punishing yourself. you are not a failure! you are struggling with things now & are not sure how to get yourself moving in the right direction. i am not sure what comments you are hearing from your folks but i am guessing that they really want you to be happy & healthy. please get involved in something that you are interested in. it can be a club at school, community or church. journaling can be helpful to keep track of what you eat & how you are feeling. it really sounds like you have to sort out lots of things. it can be done. if you are in school please reach out to your school counselor.